By now, if you’ve read some of my posts, you’ve most-likely noticed that I’m pretty random. I tend to talk about anything and everything that pops into my head. I’d started this blog to document the positive changes I’ve planned to make but it’s pretty much become an online journal and that’s okay with me. I don’t know why I feel the need to explain myself all the time, if I would just get to the point, conversations with me would be a hell of a lot shorter.
Anyway, I was browsing online today, trying to figure out how to spend my tax money. Let me tell you, I am terrible with money (and here I am, considering going back to school for accounting). I pay all my bills, but the leftover goes to a number of things I don’t need.
One unnecessary thing I happen to love to buy is underwear. I love frilly, printed, fancy, lacy, satin, silky, colorful underwear. I haven’t always had this obsession. Up through high school, I wore the multi-pack undies you could get at any department store. Then, as a high school senior something changed…the “Thong Song” broke out. After that, everyone was talking about thongs and visible panty lines.
One night, near the end of senior year, my group of friends made plans to go to the city, hang out at the mall, and go to a club (for the first time!). Of course, we had to shop for clubbing clothes which at that time consisted of: slutty top and tight pants. Now, having procured the aforementioned “clubbing uniform”, I was in need of underwear that would not lead to the dreaded “VPL”. So, for the first time ever, I stepped into Victoria’s Secret. I purchased a Body By Victoria leopard-print thong that was made out of a smooth, nylon material. I went to the mall’s bathroom, changed, and I was hooked. That following summer, I went to the semi-annual sale and purchased some more pretty panties, two of which, I still have.
My obsession was growing. I’d make frequent trips to the mall and the Victoria’s Secret website to check out what new patterns they had created for the season. Soon, boyshorts had arrived on the scene and of course, I had to get those. Whenever I’d go shopping, it always involved a visit to the underwear section. And then, I got fat.
Pretty underwear became harder and harder to find as I gained weight. So now, as I am at my all-time highest weight, I am back to buying the multi-pack from Target. So how does all of this rambling about underwear relate to the title of this post? Well, as I mentioned above, I was browsing online today for items to buy with my income tax refund. I went to one of my favorite shopping sites, HerRoom, to look for bras. I actually do need bras now and HerRoom is one place where I can find a 42H cup. I looked at bras and eventually started looking at panties when I found this:
Holy crap! This thong is an “Undie Award Winner”! It has a 4.5 star rating! It comes in over 50 colors! It is Italian! IT IS ON SALE!!!!! OMG!
I just coined the term “incentive purchase” for this *thong. By incentive purchase, I mean a purchase that one buys as an incentive to make a positive change, in my case, an incentive to lose weight. Perhaps I didn’t coin the phrase. Maybe it’s been used before. Anyway, I want this thong. Should I buy a bunch of these in hopes of losing weight? Ah, decisions, decisions.