Today I’m going to be blunt, so if you’re not prepared for a little sex talk, then divert your eyes. Otherwise, I promise not to be too graphic.
Today, I confess to my readers that I have an FWB, a “Friend-with-Benefits”. (Some might use the more vulgar term, “Fuck Buddy“.) I’d call it a commensalistic symbiotic relationship. He’s the one who benefits, I’m unaffected. I don’t see him very much, our opposing schedules prevent that. I did see him more about four years ago, when we started “sort-of dating”.
Flashback to 2009, we would hang out every weekend (of course, I had every weekend free at that time). One day, after mediocre sex, he said something along the lines of “I don’t want a relationship”. It upset me and I cried in front of him, like a clingy psycho. We took a two-week break, then we started seeing each other again. That was short-lived, as one night, I thought it was a good time to tell him over AIM (that’s AOL Instant Messenger), that he shouldn’t contact me anymore because he was using me. The end?
No, about a year later, he contacted me through Facebook. He sent me a message where he said he wanted to talk. A few days after we started talking again, I visited him at his apartment and that is how our whole friends-with-benefits-who-mainly-sext-each-other relationship began.
So, flash-forward to the present. We’ve been sexting for awhile, and as I’ve said, we rarely get to see each other. Earlier this week we were texting and as usual, he asked when I could come visit. I told him I could see him this weekend (ie. today). This morning, I get a text from him that basically says, “I’m too busy, sorry”. Mind you, I haven’t visited this guy in a year. It pissed me off to the point that I am still pissed as I post this.
I hate being pissed about it though! As I mentioned, I don’t benefit. His idea of a good time is having sex with my boobs…Seriously…that’s what he’s into. We text quite often and it’s always about “tit-fucking“. In the past, I’ve said to him in a multitude of ways, “that does nothing for me.” I’ve come up with three conclusions as to why nothing has changed: A) He didn’t hear me, B) He doesn’t get it, or, C) He ignores me. I believe it is the latter.
The first time we fooled around, way back when I started seeing him in ’09, we made out for a bit and then moved on to boob-sex. As you can imagine, he was completely de-clothed, I was topless. I was thinking to myself, “here it comes, he’s going to put his hand in my jeans, rub me a bit, then reach into my panties and rub me some more. He’ll put his fingers in me and make me feel good. Maybe he’ll even put his mouth on me.”
Those things didn’t happen, however he did get up to procure a condom from his closet. While he was doing that, I started to warm myself up, if you know what I mean. He saw me doing that, got back onto the bed, and told me to roll the condom onto him. I started to, and he moved away, saying something along the lines of “don’t touch it, you were just touching yourself”. WHAT?!?! I’d never been so insulted.
To this day, four years later, he still has not touched me there. Today, I’m asking myself, “WTF???? Why am I so angry that he didn’t invite me over? Why do I care if I see him again?” He continues to text about how he wants to cum in my mouth or on my breasts. But he never discusses pleasuring me. Why do I put up with this shit? The one thing I do enjoy about being with him is falling asleep next to him. I like to imagine that he is my friend, the one who so innocently told me I was beautiful 9 years ago. Sigh….
Now, here’s where my game-playing comes into the picture. Next time he texts, I’m prepared to not text back. It’s my immaturity rearing its ugly head. I’ve found that one of the best tactics to infuriate someone is to ignore them. Everyone hates the silent treatment and it feels so good to get a man pissed off and wondering what he’s done to deserve the cold shoulder. Now imagine, Alex in “Fatal Attraction”. YES! That’s the reaction I want!
One of the recommended links is “Mammary Intercourse”. How absurd and hilarious!