Tag Archives: timing

Children?

Newborn

Newborn (Photo credit: juliecampbell)

I’m going off-topic today because frankly, my current challenge is lame and boring. I haven’t gossiped and I really don’t feel any different.  I’m sure it’s good for my soul.

Today I went on Facebook and found out that one of my friends from college (who I don’t speak with much anymore) has just had a baby.  The thing is, I could never, ever picture this girl as a mother.  Not that she will make a bad mother, it’s just that in college, we partied together, stayed up late together, got drunk and smoked together, etc.  I know that people grow up and have different priorities but when am I going to grow up?

I don’t particularly want to grow up.  I’m 31 and I have no desire to have children anytime soon.  I may want children one day and hopefully, I’ll be able to have them if I do want that life.  Right now, I still want to party and go to bars and meet new people and stay out late.  I feel like I will have no friends left if everyone continues to have babies.  What can I do with a friend who has kids?  Does your social life end when you have a child?

It’s all very confusing to me.  Is it wrong of me to not want children?  One time, I said to my therapist that I didn’t want children and he was shocked.  I could have told him I had homicidal tendencies and his reaction would have been tamer.

I feel that part of the reason I don’t want children is because I’ve missed out on a lot of milestones that most people have experienced.  I’ve never been in love.  I live with my parents.  I don’t enjoy time with friends nearly as often as I should.  I keep hoping that these experiences will happen and that I won’t die a recluse.  I wonder if I ever do find a man to love me, will I know how to act in a relationship?  Is it too late?

I guess my big question is: Is there life after having children?

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